They are not just fun little parties for everyone that wants strong drinks and good music to flock to. THIS is the place that all these outcasts have to gather and celebrate who they are with people that understand and have been through the same discrimination and violence physical and emotional. Imagine that you grew up utterly alone and when you finally built up the courage to admit who you are, your family disowned you and you find yourself utterly alone - again. Individually, and as a member of society. As a straight person (still, presumably, but any one can have this to think about), it may be easy to gloss over what that does to your idea of who you are. GLBT+ people are still assaulted, murdered, and discriminated against all over the world. The basic human right of marriage was denied to them until very, very recently.
They lost their jobs when people found out. Up until a few decades ago homosexuals were jailed. Since you seem to be offended by the idea of safe spaces, I'll venture you've never needed one. If you're gay then you need a history lesson. If I'm wrong then I'll apologize and stand corrected. I understand why my comment annoys you but I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume you're straight. There are many respectable ways in which to bring your allies into most queer safe spaces, many gay bars included.
When the golf course instead is full of people not golfing, well, it's really lost its identity.Īnd again, I mean this in a generalist sense. And even with s just like.why am I even there? These things are designed for people that aren't me, and that's okay. But in each of these scenarios respect had better be present for me to show up in these spaces not meant for me.
I'm not an exotic stamp collector, so why would I go to the exotic stamp collector meetings each month?Ĭould I do any of those things? Of course, people are free to. I'm not participating in a book club, so I don't sit at a book club meeting discussing a book I haven't even read with the group. I don't play golf, I don't go to the golf course or driving range and take up a spot there to just watch other people play. I'm a staunch atheist, I don't crash into every church service during the week. I don't really understand why that's so hard for people to hear though. I'm not banning anyone or going through the bar checking people's boners to make sure they belong or whatever, and many gay bars are pretty open to having straight allies, just not all of them and that's okay. Oh, I'll say it, I do want straight people to stay out in a generalist sense. We don't want straight people to stay out. You might even learn something about yourself. But be respectful and nice and you shouldn't have any trouble. My advice is to go, have a drink, don't be rude, and just hang out. Those aren't the faces of angry people, those are the faces of worry about what a new person means. Or you could be another jack-ass that ruins everyone's fun, and you wouldn't be the first. You could be great and add to the environment in an awesome way. You're new, and new is always a coin flip. It's funny because to a certain degree that actually IS a grizzly bear defending their cubs.
A lot of folks walking in expecting "just a gay bar" are gonna be surprised and sadly surprise and alcohol can make some people into dicks.īig rough leather daddies looking and being aggressive is genuinely part of the scene. There are social cues and dynamics at work that are hard to catch at first. You're walking into the safe space of the sub-culture of a sub-culture. OPENLY hostile isn't cool obviously, but the Seattle freeze isn't gonna go away anytime soon.
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